Friday, February 23, 2018

REFLECTION


Every day I ponder the things of which I should write or jot down or what I should share or not share.

Every day I think about how I can improve and I ask the question of Why should I improve or should I care.

Every day I wonder if I can make it one more day, one more week, one more month, one more year.
Every day I discover a new strength, a new goal, a new attitude, a new idea.
Every day the clouds roll in and they roll out.
Every day I lay awake at night and ask for strength, I ask for peace, I ask for help and then I roll over and sleep

Every day I pray I can be forgiven. 
Every day my weaknesses are shown to me through conversation, through social media, through people that don't even know me. BTW... did you know I'm from California?
Every day I just want to gather my children and sit in a circle and smile at them, hug them, breathe into the possibilities that life has to offer.

Every day I just want to be rocked. I just want to be held. I just want to be looked at as a human being. One that makes mistakes. One that can own them. One that is trying.

Every day I want to Quit. I want to give up. I want to throw in the towel.
Every day I think how is that going to fix my situation. 
Every day I think quitting isn't an option. It isn't the fix all. It can't even cross my mind. But Why?
Every day I want to start over. I want to make better choices when I was younger. 
Every day I consider the grace God has afforded me to be here one more day.
Every day I pray that I will be a little easier on myself and on others.
Every day is sometimes all I can do to just get through another Every day.


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